Listening to Pandora Radio with the Deitrick Haddon station. I recently went to church this past Sunday and o how did I miss my church! Everytime that I seem to stray, they always are there for me and I thank them so much for that. I am such a Debbie Downer and when things lean out of my control, I get scared. But somehow, every time I get so far away, there is always a longing for what is just, what I have grown to know since birth.
God is so real to me and as I get older, I see it more and more. I can't believe I am in my second year in college and that I am going to be declaring my major soon. I am so glad that I know what I want for myself and for life. I just need to go back to the things that I love to do. I missed writing~ matter of fact I feel like I am calming down as I am here on my bed after a warm shower and having sent out all the emails I had to send out. My depression will not be treated with medication but with what is being done right now. Texting and talking to those I love, blogging, contemporary Christian music and thanking God that I am learning. For every darkness I walk into, God is a light unto me. The diet of portion control, healthy foods, water only, and perhaps a 20 minute walk every day and yoga whenever I can, even some artwork too, I can restore the joy with the help of Jesus. I can't do it alone, and the anger, anxiety and ambiguous mentality I had must go.......I must stick to what God wants for me. See all as equals. Put myself first. Do well in school. Be there for my family more. Pray more....................... Thank you Lord for the reminder......... I will come back stronger
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